A recently retired professional came into treatment to get rid of this feeling of dread that he felt in the pit of his stomach every morning that sometimes lingered throughout the day. “I never felt this way when I had a job to go to,” he told me. He couldn’t point to what was wrong, the feeling was not linked to a specific thought or worry. It just lay in wait for him every morning. His psychiatrist prescribed medication to take as needed, so sometimes he took a pill and went back to bed, hoping to sleep it off. What was happening and why?
 
If you suspect the monkey mind at work, you’re correct! While it is true that feelings of anxiety are usually accompanied by a thought, this is not always the case.  The monkey mind can sound the alarm for no apparent reason.  Woo-woo-woo! Something is wrong! Not sure what, but it’s not good, so do something!
 
Long-term pain
 
Even when we know that we are not in imminent threat, feelings of anxiety and dread are so uncomfortable that we want to get rid of them. We might take a pill, go to sleep or distract ourselves by watching TV. While it is totally understandable that we try to avoid or distract ourselves from the feeling, this guarantees us more feelings of anxiety and dread in the long run. Our monkey mind is like a child. When it throws a fit we’d best not react to it. Any attention we give to a tantrum acts a reward.
 
By taking a pill or returning to bed, my client was answering the monkey’s alarm, confirming that something was indeed wrong. Even if he were able to quell the dread that day, he had pre-ordered another serving of dread for delivery the next morning. Avoidance and distraction give us short term gain but long-term pain.
 
Long-term gain
 
The trick to easing the grip negative feelings have on us is to not resist or avoid them, and simply allow them to be here. Like other emotions and physical sensations, they don’t last. And just like a tantruming child, when ignored, the monkey mind gets tired and moves on to something else. And when we don’t react, it gets the message. I can handle this. In my client’s case, instead of resisting this feeling, I taught him to welcome it, even ask for more at times.  After a few weeks of regular practice, the feelings began to weaken.   
 
This welcoming practice recording is designed to help you to practice welcoming, instead of resisting these feelings.  Like anything else, the more you practice, the better you will become at this, and these dreadful feelings will loose their grip on you.